About Ethan

My name is Ethan James Hulbert. Sometimes it’s misspelled Cthan Hultert or Zthan Hurlbutt.

I am an artist and advertising specialist based in Los Angeles, CA.

Professionally, I help luxury brands improve their marketing strategies and overcome challenges in business. I’ve also specialized in SEO (Search Engine Optimization) for over twelve years. For more professional information, see my online resume, my ad blog, and my consulting business.

Personally, I spend most of my time reading, making art, & exploring. As much as I genuinely enjoy advertising, it doesn’t take up as much space in my life as this website may have you believe.

Want to get in touch? Scroll down to the end for my email.

My Weird Life Story

I’m originally from a rural Wisconsin town so small that our grocery store went out of business. I first went to university in La Crosse, WI for nuclear engineering before switching majors haphazardly to photography, TV production, philosophy, theater, and literature.

I then moved to Chicago, and ended up with a degree in experimental film, but instead of a film portfolio, I did a project in relativistic thermodynamics. As you might expect, this undergraduate combination left me unmarketable as both a filmmaker and a physicist, so I went back to school for nanoscience.

Meanwhile, I worked all number of odd jobs. These include: DJ, model, barista, ice cream store manager, strawberry picker, overnight hotel auditor, academic assistant, cook, morning news audio engineer, and web designer.

Eventually, I was betrayed by a Disney princess and became homeless in Chicago for a short time. This low point motivated me to get real about my future and land my first marketing job–the foundation of my current successful career path.

There’s always a silver lining!

I moved to Los Angeles for the nice weather in 2016. I enjoy antique mysteries, thunderstorms, espresso, wine tasting, cats, cooking, jewelry, fashion, fragrance, history-oriented travel, and a satisfying use of a typeface.

Quick Facts

  • Birthday: May 7th
  • Hometown: Spring Valley, WI
  • Current City: Los Angeles, CA
  • Favorite Food: Pizza! Specifically with golden brown stuffed crust, sausage, pepperoni, green peppers, onions, black olives (light), red pepper flakes, extra triple-blend parmesan cheese, and (most importantly) extra sauce
  • Favorite Authors: Catherine Besterman, Robert E. Howard, George Harmon Coxe, Richard Feynman, Peter F. Hamilton
  • Favorite Movies: The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoise, Once Upon A Time in the West, Nausicaä & Princess Mononoke, Last Year at Marienbad, The Seventh Seal, the Mission: Impossible series (except 2), the James Bond series (especially Dalton, Brosnan, & Connery), and the original Sam Raimi Spider-Man trilogy
  • Favorite TV: Columbo, Burn Notice, Matlock, Community, Daria, Danger 5, Star Trek (ENT > TOS > TAS > all others), The Orville, Murdoch Mysteries, 30 Rock, Only Murders in the Building
  • Favorite Art Style: Art Nouveau
  • Social Media: Goodreads, LinkedIn, Instagram (fake), Twitter (inactive), Letterboxd (inactive), Pinterest (inactive), Tumblr (inactive)

About This Website

I miss the old days of the Internet, before everything got so commercialized and boring, back when people would just put up homepages about themselves and their pets and their friends just because it was a neat thing to do.

There’s plenty of neat stuff online now, don’t get me wrong, but so much of it seems bland and homogenized across the same few billionaire-owned social platforms, lifelessly engineered to suck every last click and cent out of an increasingly-media-illiterate population.

Having my own homepage is my own little mental bulwark against that.

I used to spend hours optimizing everything perfectly to demonstrate my talents and show that I can. I used to say “I do SEO to this site even if it’s for terms that will never rank, simply because it bothers me if I don’t.” These days, I very purposefully don’t do that, and spend more time reading and enjoying sunlight instead.

So if possible, try to enjoy this website from a late-90s viewpoint, before the conveyor belt of Google algorithm hoops permanently tainted our capacities for simple Internet appreciation.

Contact Me

Let’s talk. I’m very friendly about emailing people, albeit a little slow.

If you’re looking for marketing work, please contact me through Jadecraft instead.

If you’re looking for a mentorship, I may have some limited availability depending on your goals.

If you’re looking for an interview, I would love to.

If you’re looking for a customer for your newest SEO software, I am not interested, but thanks.

If you want to get a coffee in downtown LA, hell yeah:

ethanjhulbert ~at~ gmail ~dot~ com

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